The details of our life recently? Well, as exciting as barista-life is... I just can't think of anything except spiritual lessons. Everyday is chock-full of them, and I usually don't see any of them until the end of the day. You know when you're in the fast pace of the moment we are usually blinded to the big picture? so, at the beginning of this day, I had to make myself recall a few:
-God, in His never, never, never, never, never-ending patience is showing me how when I praise Him when I most don't want to and against all my feelings, it is then that my life starts to get better: not in circumstances, but in perspective and that makes ALL the difference.
- I came to understand God's offer of grace in full in college, and I don't know if you had or have any preconceived notions when you became a Christian, or about Christianity but I did! One of them being I thought life was going to be a little easier, and I thought God wasn't going to require so much of me. When I looked the grace of Jesus in the face in college I knew I wanted forgiveness from God at any cost: how else was I going to get rid of all the guilt that was literally choking and strangling me? And the whole "counting the cost" thing?...how can one count the cost before hand when it gets this astronomically high? In all honesty, my faith right now really is costing me everything. But oddly enough I'm not sad or mad. I've definitley had to process with God a lot so as not to jump to wrong conclusions about His character. I've cried countless tears in the recent past, but crying to a God that is urging you to trust in His unseen-ness, talking to a Reality that really does answer into my calmed heart (once I finally commit the TIME to seek him to calm it) is the coolest thing in this universe. And it really is "all there" in the Bible and other people draw me to trust it daily.
Verse that's lifted my spirits recently: Psalm 131:1-3
Lord, I'm not going to over-value my finite perspective today. I'm not going to assume I know what you're up to. I don't concern myself with matters too great or too awesome for me to grasp. Instead I have calmed and quieted myself, like a child who definitely needs its comforting parent. O chosen one, put your hope in the LORD- now and always. *
*my little translation- read it and tell me how the Holy Spirit speak to you through it!
People I appreciate today:
+my husband! Chris who started this blog: what a romantic thing for him to do, huh?
...who helps me with my perspective on life constantly:things I think are cosmic, he bears with my stress and helps me sift them through
...who took me out on a date last night and pursued my heart,
...who doesn't ever tell me how selfish I am, but during the day I sometimes am full of regret for being selfish around him and hope that he doesn't think to himself how selfish of a person I am!
+ And I just love my mom so much, and one of the thousands of evidences of how much she trusts God is that she has never rubbed it in my face that she paid for me to get a quality college education, yet I have put on a green-apron nearly everyday for the past year and a half.
+ Sounds crazy, but I'm thankful for the corporate giant I work for. And as much as people bad-mouth the company, I have never seen one quite so dedicated to the top-notch standards this one is. So, tell your friends to do their research before judging it: like anything else. They pay their farmers more than the "fair-trade" peeps can.
+Also, am thakful for people who struggle in the praise-music business! Go get 'em on iTunes! I have benefited SO much lately from the overflow of other's hearts: the lyrics that come out of their struggles. Here are a few of my favorites and their struggles that "authenticate" their music:
-Laura Story's new album!! "Great God Who Saves" -her husband Martin was diagnosed with a brain tumor in their first year of marriage, and she continued to praise God through it all and birthed this record in that.
-Jeremy Camp-his new wife died after only a few years into their marriage yet he can sing "I still believe" that God is good and has a master plan that will benefit me.
-Ginny Owens- she is blind yet plays the piano beatifully and can articulate realness and candor in her lyrics like most artists seem they would be exposing themselves if they did so.
-Aaron Keyes- a friend of mine from college. He focuses on the greatness of God in all of his songs and makes me put my circumstances behind His greatness, majesty, and complete capability. So, if I really listen, I can't not be changed. His newest album is called "Not Guilty Anymore"
... At the End of the Day, remember it's us who serve God, not Him who serves us! most days I forget that, but He whispered it to me yesterday.
"Lord, if You kept a record of our sins, who could survive? But you offer forgiveness! that we might learn to fear you. I am COUNTING on the Lord; yes, I am counting on Him. I have put my HOPE in His word." psalm 130:3-5
"For even the Son of man came not to be served, but TO serve and to give His life as a ransom for many." -Matthew 20:28 are you almost commanding God to serve you by wanting certain desires so much?
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